The relationship appears to provide secure protection because it lacks violent fights and loud arguments and awkward moments of silence. The relationship maintains its peaceful state but underneath that peaceful exterior people involved in the relationship use their conflict avoidance skills to determine their methods of loving each other and their ways of communicating and remaining silent. The relationship ends through a gradual process which results in unresolved issues and unfulfilled needs. The relationship exists between two people who choose to maintain their distance from each other.
The Quiet Beginning That Feels Like Care
Two people make a promise to themselves that they will never engage in any fights. One person swallows his irritation. The other person switches the discussion to another subject. They use fake smiles to hide their actual disagreements which they consider to be highly risky. The first stage of this process shows men as grown-up people. The act of kindness emerges as the genuine way to demonstrate peace. You believe that peace represents the active demonstration of love between two people.
People need to establish actual connections because they require open platforms to share their actual selves. The partner who consistently avoids all uncomfortable situations will make their emotional truthfulness decrease. People start to withhold minor details. The process leads to bigger facts being hidden. Love between two people develops into a cautious relationship which develops into a distant bond. People begin to use conflict avoidance as their main way to deal with problems but this creates an obstacle which stops their progress.
Why Peacekeeping Slowly Turns Into Emotional Distance
People who want to avoid conflicts develop this behavior because they experience fear. They experience three types of fear which include rejection and abandonment and being considered excessive. People usually handle their emotional pain through silence instead of expressing their feelings. People utopically anticipate rebirth among others without any changes in their own behaviors.
Resentment continues to exist because it does not vanish from people. Unspoken feelings leak out through sarcastic comments and emotional detachment and complete shutdowns. Partners experience confusion because everything seems fine but they sense something is wrong. The relationship becomes emotionally quiet, but internally loud.
The two partners will develop invisible barriers which make them feel distant. The partners begin to doubt their relationship when they wonder whether their honesty will end their connection. The question demonstrates how easily peacekeeping arrangements can break down.
How Avoiding Conflict Affects Love Long-Term
Relationships need repair work to reach their full potential because perfection does not exist. The unresolved conflict creates a situation where the same patterns continue to occur. People fail to get their needs met while they maintain their emotional protection.
People who avoid conflict avoidance find it difficult to establish their personal boundaries. They agree when they want to say no. They provide support for others while they ignore their own needs. Their feelings become unrecognizable to them as time passes. People do not experience love as an authentic connection anymore because they see it as a need to act.
Intimacy needs partners to show their vulnerable sides. Partners who avoid sharing their uncomfortable feelings will not be able to express their most profound wants and anxieties and aspirations. The relationship exists at a shallow level which creates an appearance of stability but lacks real emotional connection.
Choosing Honest Communication Without Creating Chaos
The choice to be honest will not result in open conflict. The choice to be honest will make everything understandable. You can express discomfort through calm communication. You can express your differences with others through respectful disagreement. You can speak without attacking.
Begin with small tasks. Instead of saying “you always,” use “I feel.” Take a moment to think before answering. You ought to listen to others in order to understand them, not to prepare your defense. The partners who both create space for discomfort will experience trust development. The security of the relationship will increase.
The practice of avoiding conflict will not result in peace destruction. The practice of conflict avoidance will create a stronger form of peace. The foundation of this relationship exists through honest communication that replaces silence.
When Love Feels Safer With Truth
Real love can hold disagreement. It can survive awkward conversations. It can stay present even when emotions feel messy. The peace that results from honest communication lasts longer than the peace which comes from hiding truth.
People who see themselves as peaceful should stop choosing silence as their preferred method to maintain a harmonious relationship. People need to examine whom they attempt to shield from disturbance and what personal sacrifices they make for that protection. Love needs to create an atmosphere which provides security to our relationship.
The requirements for building relationships extend beyond achieving complete harmony. Relationships require people to demonstrate their belief in each other through their courageous actions. People need the bravery to express their thoughts. People need to develop the capacity to understand others through active listening. People need to maintain their integrity throughout all situations. The foundation of enduring emotional bonds exists in that space.
